Finally!

I'm going to pick him up at the airport tonight! I'm so excited to see him. It's been almost a week. Five days without him. I'll admit, the days got easier but the time went by too slow. The first night without him, I barely slept. The next night, a little bit better, and so on. However, it will be 100 times better with him by my side.

I just dropped my man off at the airport. He is going with a friend to Iowa and won't be back until Tuesday. I miss him already and it hasn't even been an hour! I'll miss his voice, his smile, his eyes. I'll miss holding his hand and kissing him goodbye when I go to work. I'll miss sitting out on our balcony smoking a late night cigarette and then crawling into bed with him. I'll miss our late night conversations and our tickle fights. I'll miss cuddling up to him and his body heat surrounding me. I'll miss waking up to him. I'll miss coming home from work and seeing him smile as I walk in the door.
Of course, I'll be able to text him and talk to him on the phone. But of course, it's not the same. A week may not seem like a long time. But without him, it will be. He will be out in Iowa, a new place that he's never been to, and the week will fly by for him. But I'll be here, in our apartment, by myself and it will be one of the longest weeks ever. I am thankful that it's only a week. I don't know how people with husbands/boyfriends in the military. Their man is gone for months, even years, at a time. Ugh. No thanks.
Now, I'm not at all regretting that he is going. He was so excited. He hasn't been out of the state for quite a while. He's never been to Iowa. He loves flying. Plus, he is going with one of his best friends. He is going to have an amazing time. And I trust him completely. But it still sucks.
This week is going to make me realize just how much I love him. I can already tell. I've never been the type of girl that has to have a man. I love the single life. I could be single forever, if I never found a guy worth sticking with. But I have found that guy. I've found the guy who makes it all worthwhile. And I see no reason to be single when I can have him. I've joked with him that while he is gone, I'll be all depressed and won't know what to do with myself. However, I won't actually be depressed and I will find things to do without him. But I'll still miss him and wish he was with me. And it will be so nice to have him back in a week.

Evolution . . . ha!

I love Jay Leno. He is an amazing comedian and talk show host. No matter who he has on his show, I love watching it. Even when it is someone who I don't care for, Jay makes it interesting and funny.

So I was watching Jay Leno last night. He had some scientist on his show. It was one of the ones who studies space. I guess he has a show on PBS too. He's the one who recategorized Pluto. He just wrote a book about it. Well he was talking to Jay about the things they have found on Mars. There was just a discovery on Mars, something about molecules or close to molecules, suggesting that maybe there was life on Mars, millions of thousands of years ago. The scientist and Jay then began talking about what if there had been life on Mars, and a meteor came and crashed into Mars, killing all life. Then pieces from Mars, with molecules from that life, flew through space and landed on Earth. Over the next thousands of years, those molecules evolved and, well, evolution!

I'm not very religious. My dad was raised Mormon, but does not attend church. My mom was raised Presbytyrian and attends a local Christian church. I attended with her until I was in high school, when I started fighting it and my parents finally gave in and stopped making me go. I was babtized Christian when I was two. I went to a Christian church camp from fourth grade until I was a sophmore in high school and loved it. I deeply believe in God and Jesus and everything in the Bible. I may not live a "Christian life," but I do believe.

So of course, this whole bit about life coming from Mars pisses me off. I hate the Big Bang Theory and can't even come close to believing in evolution. Do you honestly think that we came from monkeys? And now Mars?! No way. But this theory will stick with a lot of people. All the people who believe in evolution with love it. It will just feed their fire.

College is no scam.

I watched 20/20 at work tonight. The first part of the show was about that plane that crash landed in the Hudson River yesterday. Have to admit, that was pretty amazing. The second part of the show was called, "How Much Are You Worth?" The first part of that segment was about why people don't talk to each other about their salaries. Suze Orman(I think that's her name), the "amazing" financial expert, said that we should talk about our salaries. She said something about how we talk about sex, so why not talk about money? The next part of that segment was about college and the debate about whether college is some sort of scam.

First, I'll state the facts. As high schoolers, and even before then, we are encouraged to attend college and earn some sort of degree. The reasoning behind this is that as a college graduate, you will get a better paying job and be more successful in life. If you don't attend college, you will have a mediocare job and make less money. I guess these arent exactly facts, but what we grow up believing.

The show interviewed three individuals who attended college, got a degree, and then ended up not so successful. One woman who earned a degree had to move in with her mother because she oculdn't afford her apartment. She is working as a secretary earning about $11 an hour. She is also thousands of dollars in debt. The next one, a young man, also earned a degree and is now unhappy at his call center job. He too, is thousands of dollars in debt. The third guy has the same story. All three of them wish that they hadn't gone to college. They believe that they would be better off, and of course, not so far in debt.

Then the show interviewed a guy who counsels college students. He helps them figure out how to get a job after attending college. He talked about how if someone was in the bottom 4% of their high school graduating class, they should either attend a two-year trade school college or no college at all. He said that college is a scam, overcharging students and then not properly preparing them for life after college.

Ok, so here's my take on it. As I said before, growing up we are encouraged to go to college because it will help us to get a good job. I believe that a lot of people who fail after college have a certain mind set. They believe that it won't be hard to get a job in their field after college. It should be a piece of cake after graduating, that every employer will want them and that they will be rich. Obviously, this is not the case. The people who do succeed after college are the ones who realize they still have to work and try and put out effort. If you graduate and don't think you still have to work, you are sadly mistaken. You still need the drive to succeed. You still need to try. You can't sit on your ass and wait for an employer to call you. I think that for many people, college is a good, or even great, thing. For many people, college will help them succeed. But for others, maybe a different route would be best.

Start taking responsibility.

Reader's Digest . . . ever heard of it? My mom read it. She has for as long as I can remember. When I really started getting into reading, I would read them too. Then I moved out. And now, she has started sending me her copies as soon as she finishes them. I devour them. They are very interesting. And I've always enjoyed all the articles. Until the January 2009 issue that I've been reading.
Page 86 is the article called "13 Things You Never Knew About Your Weight." I started reading it and then started getting a little irritated and then just skimmed the rest of the article. Basically, instead of blaming obesity on people eating the wrong foods and not exercising, this article tried to find other things, such as "fat genes" to blame it on. They blamed obesity on genetics, stress (that one I actually get), an obese person's mother when she was pregnant, a spouse (this one I also understand), a virus, ear infections, and a few others.
Apparently, some people have fat cells that are passed down from their parents. If you have more than one fat cell, basically your screwed.
Obviously stress can affect your weight. The more stressed you are, the more likely you are to eat too much or too little.
Now, when your mother was pregnant with you, if she ate fatty foods, that could be the cause of your obesity. Seriously?! That's ridiculous.
Of course, if your spouse is obese, there is a greater chance of you becoming obese as well. Same as if your spouse is thin, it can motivate you to also become thin.
Ok so the whole virus thing. Apparently they are called "adenoviruses." Sounds like if you have the so called "fat cells" and you get this virus, it can increase those fat cells. Then it goes on to say, "We have flue shots; could an obesity vaccine be the next step?" God how stupid does that sound.
And last but not least is an ear infection. They talked about if you are over the age of 35 and have had a few ear infections, then it affects your taste buds and makes you more likely to become obese. Wow. That's dumb.
Ok here's the way I see it. If you eat gross, fatty foods and sit on your ass all day and just don't do anything, then you're going to get fat. (sorry, "obese") But if you eat relatively well and move around some, then you'll be a lot better off. So stop blaming genes or viruses for you being fat. Start taking responsibilty for the way you look and stop trying to blame something that is outside of your control. Do you see the thin people in Europe blaming genetics? Oh that's right, they aren't obese because they take care of themselves so they don't have to blame anything on ear infections.

Life can be beautiful.

He is a lot more laid back then I am. A lot more chill. He's never in a hurry to get things done. He relaxes and takes everything in stride. Me, on the other hand, I'm a lot more hurried. I feel the need to move quickly and rush things. Get things done as quickly as possible. I guess that's one of the reasons we fit together so well. We balance each other out. He shows me that I need to chill out sometimes and I show him that there are times when he needs to hurry. Even if it doesn't seem like it sometimes, we are perfect for each other. We compliment each other in every way. We talk about everything. We tell each other everything. We help each other with everything. He knows my secrets and I know his. He reminds me that life can be beautiful.

Let's go stereotyping!

Stereotype . . . what does that word mean? According to dictionary.com, the word stereotype means, "a set form; convention." Then it has "sociology : a simplified and standardized conception or image invested with special meaning and held in common by members of a group: The cowboy and Indian are American stereotypes." Ok so basically, if you are stereotyped by someone, then you are put into a certain group, actually labeled. That takes me back to high school where there were preps, jocks, stoners, and so on. It didn't matter if someone was actually a stoner, if they were put in the group, stereotyped as a stoner, then that was where they would stay for most of high school. Most of the time, people don't want to be stereotyped. But why? It's just a word. If someone stereotypes you, that is just their opinion of you. There really isn't that much to worry about. People are going to think what they want of you. So what if you met someone who was determined not to be stereotyped? So much so that he doesn't like listening to any popular band for the sole reason that they are popular. It's not that he doesn't like the music, it's because the band is liked by the majority of people. Then his attitude was, "I'm trying to be different." He even began talking about stereotypes and not wanting to be stereotyped. Basically, he just didn't want to be put into a group, catagorized, so he tried really hard to be different. Really? Is it that horrible to be stereotyped?

A difference?

Would you let one of your boyfriend's best friends drive drunk?
Would you chase him down for a half hour in the parking lot to prevent him from killing himself?
Would you be angry if someone tried to stop you?
Would you be angry if someone said it was none of your business?
Would you feel useless when your boyfriend let him drive drunk?
Would you feel awkward when the smallest words don't make it all better?

Tonight was an amazing celebration. It was a celebration to bring in the year 2009. I had some of my closest friends with me and, of course, my boyfriend whom I love dearly and would do anything for. A bit of drinking, a bit of laughing, a lot of living. None of the drama that usually comes with lots of people drinking in a small space. A lot of chill people who just wanted to have fun and celebrate. We brought in the new year with some kisses and a lot of yelling "happy new year!" It was definitely a good way to end the year 2008 and start the year 2009.
At least for an hour. After a bit, one of my boy's best friends tried driving. Drunk of course. He could barely walk. He could barely run away from me when I tried taking away his car keys, which was his girlfriend's request. I really didn't mind. Mostly because my boy cares about him and is his good friend. However, when, later, my boy decided to let him walk away and drive, still very drunk, with little effort to stop him, I felt a bit useless and silly. Silly for chasing him down because in the end, it was useless. He still drove drunk. And it doesn't matter if he made it home safe or not. A few seconds is all it takes to be killed and/or kill someone else. So my chasing him down and trying to stop him meant nothing. So why did I even try? Maybe next time I won't. Next time I'll just say, "fuck it. It didn't matter last time so why will it matter next time?" And even though I say I wouldn't do it again, I know I will. I always will. If someone that I know tries to drive home, very, very, very drunk, then I will do my best to stop them. But when my efforts are not even recognized, it makes me wonder why the fuck do I even try? I will, of course, always try. No matter what. No matter who says that it's none of my business. No matter who tries to "bumb" me out of the way. I will always try until I can't try anymore. And then, I will just let go and be done with it and say, "well I tried and that's all I can do." Maybe someday it will come to something. Me trying. My efforts will someday make a difference and save someones' life. Or touch someone. Or make a difference. Who knows when that will be. But I will try and wait until it happens. And even after that moment when my efforts make a difference, I will still continue on and keep trying until the day that I die. Because that's just who I am. That's just how I was made. The end.