It's been a while.

It's funny how life changes and stays the same.
It's funny how people you once knew become strangers.
It's funny how people you wish could be your friend, cant.
It's funny how I want everything all at once.

I've found something that I can depend on. My life right now is very stable. And I like it that way. But at the same time, I want it to change. I can't decide what I want in my life, or who. I'm almost getting sick of this place and I've been here, what, five months? Shit, that's ridiculous. But I almost feel like I need to start over again. But I don't think I can leave the people that I have here. That's why I don't understand my friend _____. He's been here about four months and he has people that care about him, even though he might not think so. Yet he wants to move back to California because he kind of fucked up his money situation. He thinks that his life will be better down there. Then why did he leave in the first place? I don't understand that.

I'm loving my new job. I work with adults who have disabilities in their homes. I'm a float, so I work four hours and one home and then four hours at another home. I love the people that I'm working with and so far, it seems worth my time because I feel like I'm actually making a difference in their lives. I've never done work like this before. I've waitressed, I've cooked, I've worked in retail and sales, but never anything like this, nothing this hands-on. It's completely different and definitely more challenging. But also more rewarding. Even if the money isn't.