L o v e

How long does it take for someone to fall in love? I've heard that it takes a while. But some people believe that you can know within the first day of being with that someone. I don't believe in love at first sight. I believe in lust at first sight. So when will you know if you really, truly love someone? How can you know? What does it feel like?

It feels like you're jumping off of a cliff and into ice-cold water. When you first jump, it's the scariest thing you've ever experienced. As you're falling through the air, it's the most wonderful feeling anyone can ever feel. And just before you hit the water, you wonder why you jumped. As you fall through the water, you can barely breath and it's so cold you can barely move. As you surface and begin to swim to shore, you want to do it again because it's the most exciting thing. You have no idea whether you'll surface after you hit the water. You have no idea how deep the water really is. You have no idea whether you'll survive. But you do it anyway. Why? Because in the end, it's totally worth it.

It's worth being scared a little. It's worth risking everything you have. It's worth it because loving someone, giving them your whole heart with no inhibitions, is the most beautiful feeling ever. Of course, it's called "falling in love" for a reason. You truly are falling. You've giving yourself to someone, handing them your heart and trusting them not to break it. You have to have complete trust in the one you're loving. You have to trust that they will love you back. And that's one the most difficult things ever.

There's a movie that says when your heart is broken, the whole universe expands and makes it possible for you to love even more next time. I think that's true. I've been broken more than once and all of a sudden, I feel like I've never felt for anyone else. I feel like I'm jumping off a forty-story building into water that is infested with sharks. But I don't care. I want to give myself to him and I want the same from him. I feel like I can be myself around him and he won't judge me. I loving being with him and talking to him and when I'm not, I love just the thought of being with him and talking to him. And I think, "what if he's the one?" That's really scary to me, especially because I'm so young. I always told myself that I wouldn't get really serious and get married until my mid-to late twenties. And I'm not even twenty right now! But I feel like I could spend the rest of my life with him. And I don't want it to stop.